“Do you know what? When I take a shit it feels soooooo good. But can you check if my butt is schmeery?”
-my son Leo
Mar 302007
Mar 282007
So I’ve mentioned several times that I have been painting different rooms around my house over the last few weeks. It’s like a disease, this painting thing, and it’s now in my blood and I can’t stop but DEAR GOD! I want to stop. And the funny thing is I didn’t ever, I mean never ever, think I would be the person that paints there entire house with every room a different color.
Last weekend I was talking about the painting, because it is so obviously the only thing I have in my life, and Chris reminded me of something really funny. He asked me if I remembered the state of our first house when we bought it. Did I? Remember? That house? How could I not!
The first house we bought after we were married was 1,100 square feet of 1970′s glory packed in a rambler with lava rock decorating the outside. But really the outside was tame compared to what lay inside. For one thing, the house was inhabited by no less than 7, and sometimes even up to 9, overweight adults. In 1,100 square feet. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms. Nine people. Nine very big people. Apparently to spice things up, because all those people weren’t enough, they had painted every single room a different color. And every single room had a different color and style of carpet, including the kitchen and bathrooms. And to top that all off they had used the space under the back yard deck as a garbage dump. I know, I know, that has nothing to do with paint, but I believe it speaks to the level of taste and care these people took with their home.
The first thing we did when we got the keys, besides change the locks, was paint the whole house in the same neutral color. Then we ripped out all seven different colors of carpet and put down some nice neutral carpet and vinyl flooring. And finally we removed about 25 garbage bags worth of junk from under the deck. We spent the next four years in that house, making no end of fun of the previous owners and their tastelessness.
Do you see the irony people? I lived here, in our new house, four years before I became so bored of the neutral walls that I snapped. And so I’ve been painting. Each of the kids rooms different color. The bathrooms a different color. The kitchen, dining room, living room, basement, ALL IN THEIR OWN COLOR. My God, I have become those people! The ones I made fun of. The ones with no taste. That is now me. Please no one look under my deck. I’m afraid of what you’ll find.
Mar 262007
If there is one thing about my life that I frequently regret, it’s my complete inability to deal. Or, maybe more accurately, the way I chose to deal with things that are overwhelming to me. I like to hide. I deal by not dealing, which any adult can tell you is totally stupid and won’t get you anywhere.
Lots of times when I was growing up and I couldn’t deal with school, socially or academically, I would just be sick for a few days. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that this method of dealing actually made everything worse and more stressful because stuff doesn’t just go away, it compounds. It gets WORSE, so much worse than if you had just fucking dealt with it in the first place. Sheesh!
I would like to think that this is a lesson I’ve learned and a behavior I no longer engage in, but if I thought that I would be lying to myself in addition to hiding from life which makes me even more pathetic.
Anyway, I wish I was going somewhere useful with this, but I’m not. Last week I was still doing painting projects around my house, and being depressed, and taking Sunny to the dentist to get an $800 appliance to help her stop sucking her thumb, and being depressed, and worrying about my cat who is licking herself bloody all over her body and the potential vet bill, and being depressed. And I’m on medicine people. What good is the stuff if it doesn’t work some of the time? I’m not sure.
I think I’ve snapped out of my little episode of hiding and depression though. I had a really nice weekend. My friend Susan gave me some really good tips for things I can do at home to help my masochistic cat. I got my hair done for the first time in months, but I have to say I’m somewhat scared about what was done to it. The sun is out, the weather nice, and I am alive and present.
Mar 192007
The sky above my house one evening last summer. This is one reason I totally love Utah, we have the best sunsets ever.
Mar 162007
I have been painting up a storm over the last two weeks or so. I started with the basement, which I wrote about here. Then I moved on to the kids rooms, as I could no longer ignore the loud violent demands of my little monsters (er, I mean ANGELS) to have their rooms painted in their favorite colors. So I busted my ass, and painted all day long for three days so that I could have some peace and quiet. Now that I am done, I have observed just how closely the kids favorite colors reflect their personalities.
Leo’s room in cool blue
Sunny’s room in pale pink
Badger’s room in screaming bright orange
“I am smarter than you, Mom.”
“Yes, Badger you are very smart.”
“But I AM SMARTER THAN YOU!”
Mar 122007
Dear Ben Franklin,
Thanks so much for making every spring a living hell by forcing me to get myself and my kids out of bed an hour earlier just so you can save some candles. I don’t care about your candles, this shit blows!
and while I’m bitching:
Dear Girl Scouts,
Thanks so much for making every spring a fat fest, because your Thin Mint cookies are addictive. You should know that I have no self-control and when I order 4 boxes of these cookies I will eat them all by myself within a week. You are ruining my life, and any hope I have of my in-laws not commenting on how I need to start working out. Thanks for nothing!
Mar 092007
this photo by Chris of Bear, the most lovable and annoying dog in the universe.
“I love rock music. Rock music is the best. I want to listen to LOTS of rock music. Not hip hop. I can’t stand hip hop. I don’t even know how people can listen to hip hop. I think rock is the best.”
-my son Leo while playing a really mean air guitar
Mar 052007
